7.7.08

I am so laden with sadness I can hardly lift my head off the pillow. The more time that lapses between us makes this more and more real. The reality that you're not returning. The reality that you wouldn't, even if you could. You were my life, and I yours. So to think that you are still my life, and I'm no longer yours is driving me nuts. Completely nuts.

My life has fallen down
around me before,
--lots of times,
for lots of reasons--
usually other people.

And most of the time
I was fortunate enough
to have a large lump of
that life hit me on the
head and render me numb
to the pain & desolation
that followed.
And I survived.
And I live to love again.

But this,
this slow erosion from below
--or within--
it's me falling down around my life
--but not really.
And you're out of that life
--but not quite.

-P. McWilliams

all i need is
someone to
talk to
about
you
but
you
are the
only person
I can really
talk to.
trapped.

-P. McWilliams